SUMMARY:  Post-Serenity story.  When these five kinds [of spies] are all at work, none can discover the secret system.  This is called divine manipulation of the threads. -Sun Tze

*****

The crew settled uneasily in the dining area.  Simon took a seat between Kaylee, who wouldn't look at him, and River, who wouldn't look away from Mal.  Were he less literal-minded, he might have considered the metaphorical significance.

The rest of the crew settled in around the dining room table to discuss Leung, who was sedated and dozing quietly in the infirmary.  Simon had left the comm link open to hear his patient's first stirrings; before that happened, he wanted someone to damn well explain to him what connection River had to an Alliance spy whom Mal and Zoe had known during the war.  River was a just a little girl during the war -- a beloved, protected girl on the central planets who knew of the war only from the nightly newswave and an occasional discussion around the dinner table.

Mal seemed reluctant to discuss the subject, pacing in small loops near the head of the table.

Arms crossed, Zoe leaned back in her chair.  "Sir?"

"Huh?"  Mal glanced around the table, grimaced, and crossed his arm, girding himself for the discussion.  "Leung was assigned to one of the brigades in Yeng-Wang-Yeh that lost a commander.  Wasn't as bad as -- some other battles," Mal edited, even though everyone at the table knew he was referring to Serenity Valley, "but I ended up in command of a couple extra brigades."

Hands wrapped around a warm cup of tea, Inara tapped her fingernails against the ceramic and asked, "So you know this man and River knows him.  How is that possible?"

"Small 'verse," Kaylee murmured, drawing Simon's attention, but she kept that wide-eyed gaze trained on Mal, and Simon wasn't sure whether she hadn't noticed his look or was purposefully ignoring him.

Simon glanced over at River, who had a half-smile on her face.  "I don't know him," she explained, seemingly lucid.  She nodded at her brother, the movement strangely encouraging, as if she were simply bucking up his confidence at one of his Academy grassball matches.  "I know of him.  He is me."

"Yeah, yeah, he is me," Jayne snapped, setting his jug of liquor down with more force than strictly necessary.  "What the ruttin' hell does that mean?"

"Leung went to the Academy," Zoe answered, her voice low.  "Just like River.  And I'm guessing they did things to him, just like River."

"That right, little albatross?" Mal asked, moving closer to River.  His tone was surprisingly gentle, which irked Simon.  He should be the one asking his sister the questions, not Mal.  Mal had no training, no experience dealing with fragile psyches, and he certainly didn't care for River as much as Simon did.

River just nodded at Mal, that strange half-smile still in place.  "They took his mind apart and reassembled it until he soared not-free."

Frowning, Mal asked, "Not free?"

"They put him on a leash," River answered, her tone pugnacious in a way Simon remembered from their childhood.  "Like a dog."

"A flying dog?" Jayne sneered.

Straightening in her seat, Kaylee glared across the table at him.  "Jayne."  He shrugged insolently, but subsided.

None of which distracted Simon from what his sister had said.  He turned his attention to Mal.  "You said Leung was an Alliance spy."

Mal nodded, his mouth tight, and Zoe rounded on him, looking incredulous.  "You knew this?  Back then?"

"Suspected.  Gave him some false information," Mal explained, gaze trained on Zoe, "seemed like the Alliance kept turning up where I told Leung we'd be.  Knew it when he got lifted."

Zoe looked a bit miffed.  "Shél yĕ bú gāosu wŏ rènhé shìqing."

"You didn't need to know," Mal answered.  "Can't swing a dead cat during a war without hitting three spies.  We had ours in their camp, too."

"We did?" Zoe asked, lifting an eyebrow.

"Sure."

Zoe considered for a moment.  "Impressive," she decided.  "Never thought our side had many who could play at bein' a purplebelly without setting the real purplebellies to laughing."

Kaylee tilted her head in Jayne's direction.  "Jayne convinced the Alliance he was a loyal guard," she noted.  Her obvious pride in his accomplishment slithered under Simon's skin, irritating him further.

"Fair point," Zoe conceded, half-smiling at Jayne.  "You're gonna grow that back, right?" she asked, pointing to his bare chin and scrunching her nose a bit in distaste.

"'Nara didn't seem to mind me cleanshaven," Jayne shot back, aiming a leer at Inara.

Inara reached for an apple and tossed it at his head, while Mal, stiff and suspicious, asked, "'Scuse me?"

"I said," Jayne answered, polishing the apple on his filthy t-shirt, "that--"

"Can we possibly," Simon interrupted, unable to abide their levity under the circumstances, "get back to the alleged spy in the infirmary and what possible connection he has to my sister?"

Jayne shrugged and took a loud bite of the apple, staring at Simon with an insolent smirk as he chewed.

Mal answered in clipped tones, still staring at Inara with narrowed eyes, "I think the Alliance sent Leung in to spy during the war, and I think they did it without his consent."

Jayne paused mid-chew, looking puzzled.  Kaylee shook her head and asked, "Without his consent?"  Frowning, she glanced to Zoe for clarification.  "But how could they do that?"

Simon went very still, hating the implications.  Disbelieving the implications because they were so repulsive.  "You're saying--"

"The Alliance twisted his mind until they could control him.  And then they sent him in," Mal confirmed, looking none too pleased himself.

"Mind control?" Zoe asked, leaning forward a bit, her hands folded together on the tabletop.  "Sir, that's--"

"Crazy," Inara supplied.

"You've seen it with your own eyes," Mal answered Zoe, ignoring Inara's outburst entirely.  "They programmed River with an on/off switch.  She didn't kill those people in the Maidenhead of her own free will."

Reflexively, Simon glanced at his sister, who ducked her chin.  Her hair hid her face, but she pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them, shrinking into herself.  The sight tightened Simon's gut.  He wasn't sure whether whisking her away from any discussion about the Maidenhead would be protective or damaging.

"That's different."  Inara shook her head, speaking animatedly now.  "There's no way to turn humans into mindless drones serving the will of their master.  Not the way you're suggesting."

"You're so sure of that?" Mal challenged.  "Because we got a former Alliance spy in there talking gibberish after getting pinched for some political crime.  Pieces don't add up right."

"That doesn't mean you change from base-10 to base-47 and try again," Simon interjected, his tone irritable.  Of course, no one in the room except his sister understood his admittedly poor metaphor, and she didn't seem to be paying attention, so Simon pressed on, willing himself to remain calm.  "Just because the pieces don't add up with what limited information we have now doesn't mean you can assume an implausible premise to be true just because it happens to fit into your paranoid world view."

"Paranoid world view?" Mal sputtered, taking two steps and leaning forward to place his palms flat on the tabletop.  "'Case you haven't noticed, we've been two steps from prison since Miranda.  Ain't my fondest wish to believe the Alliance is capable of something like this, but I don't have the luxury of ignoring explanations don't cast your sister in the best light."

"Mal," Inara implored.  "Maybe we should discuss this later."

Simon stood, his chair scraping loudly along the floor.  "My sister--"

"--brought us here," Mal interrupted loudly, his words echoing in the sudden quiet.  "Just like she brought us to Miranda.  We already know they tweaked her brain at that Academy, and you yourself know there are things she can do need a safe word to snap her out.  You telling me that ain't enough to start linking coincidences together?"

Simon couldn't muster the words to argue.  He could feel the curious gazes of the others looking twixt he and his sister.  He wanted to bundle River onto the extra shuttle and take her away from this place, but no matter how much he rejected the thought, there were too many coincidences for him to walk away.  Not if walking away would take River from the safest place she'd been since she left home.

"If the Alliance was able to program Leung so completely fifteen years ago," Zoe said slowly. Her gaze shifted to River and she didn't finish the thought.  She didn't need to.

Simon watched, burning with anger, as every person in the room turned wary gazes to River.  His sister slowly lifted her head, staring back at Zoe with a blank expression on her face.  She didn't say a word in her own defense.  Simon, noting the way she simply sat there with her unruly locks and her fragile expression, couldn't understand how anyone could suspect her of anything sinister.

Simon placed his hand on River's shoulder.  "She's not a spy," he spat, furious.

Mal and Zoe exchanged a significant look, then the Captain met Simon's gaze and said, "Not willingly."  Mal turned his attention to River.  "But maybe you don't even know it's happening."

"That's it," Simon snapped, urging his sister to rise.  "We're done here."

*****

Kaylee watched, torn, as Simon bundled his sister in a blanket and ushered her out of the kitchen, glancing back to favor 'em all with a withering look.  Kaylee ducked her chin guiltily.  

Weren't fair, suspecting River of who knows what.  Still, Kaylee remembered all too clear the dread she'd felt when River killed three o' Niska's men without blinking.  Add that to the Maidenhead and the Reavers, well...  River had special powers, no doubt.  But a spy?  Working for the Alliance?  Kaylee didn't want to believe that.

At the head of the table, Mal pulled a chair out and plopped down into it.  "That went well," he commented, catching Zoe's eye.

Zoe only lifted an eyebrow and asked, "Who were our spies?"

Gesturing at Kaylee, Jayne, and Inara, Mal asked, "Do you really think it's a good idea to go listing our spies?"

With the slightest hint of smile, Zoe nodded  "You'll tell me later."

"No, I won't," Mal answered, turning his gaze on Kaylee.  "I need you to think about something, little Kaylee."

Kaylee still wasn't sure what Cap'n intended to do 'bout her spying mission down on Eunomia.  Jayne said Mal was madder than a wet hen, but they hadn't really had time to say more 'n two words to each other, seeing as how she got back to Serenity right before he and Simon headed for the prison.  "Think about something?" she echoed, proud her voice didn't shake.

"That piece of metal in the engine," Mal said, and Kaylee instinctively folded her healing fingertips into her palms.  "Did you ever identify it?"

"The burnt metal?" Kaylee asked, shaking her head a bit.  "No, but when I fixed up the engine, she told me it weren't hers.  Guess it must've been space trash."

Inara sat up straighter, glaring at Mal.  "You can't be serious."

Frowning, Jayne looked between Inara and Mal.  "What?"

Mal ignored the others, holding Kaylee's gaze.  "You ever seen space trash end up in a compressor before?"

"Well... no," she answered slowly, starting to see where he was going with this and not likin' it one tiny bit.  He couldn't be right 'bout River.  She was just a troubled girl, mind all twisted up with torture and bein' turned into a fightin' machine.  "But there must be quite a bit of space trash out there," Kaylee said, gesturing toward the ceiling to indicate open space above them.  "Chances are it's happened before," Kaylee concluded, shrugging.

"What's happened?" Jayne repeated, frustrated.

"Mal," Inara implored.

"Ain't asking your opinion," Mal snapped back, not looking at Inara.  "Kaylee, could someone have put that metal in the engine?"

Kaylee reflexively wanted to say no, River couldn't have done it.  But she made herself consider the question.  She'd climbed halfway into the thruster to drag the chunk of charred metal out of Serenity's compressor.  Stood to reason someone could've done the same to jam the piece in there in the first place.   Someone small, 'cause Kaylee'd had a devil of a time slithering her way into position.

"Guess so," she answered quietly

Jayne sneered, dropping the half-eaten apple onto the tabletop.  "Who'd disable the ship on purpose out in the black?" he scoffed.  "Ain't the kind of prank you walk away from."

Mal ignored him.  "Kaylee?" he pressed.

She looked around for help, but Zoe was simply looking right back all placid-like.  Kaylee didn't want to answer, but she owed the Cap'n the truth.  "Would have to be someone small 'nough to fit in the hatch," she admitted.

"Why would River sabotage the ship?" Inara demanded angrily.  "Mal, you know she would never do such a thing."

"River?" Jayne echoed, eyes wide.  "You think Little Sister--"

"I don't know," Mal interrupted.  "Could've been space trash.  I just need to consider all the possibilities.  Zoe, we got anything in the works?"

"Jobs, sir?"

"Something real legal-like would be good about now."

"Jean-Paul waved," Zoe answered.  "Needs something fetched to Beaumonde."

Mal groaned.  "Define 'something.'"

"Dunno, sir.  Thought it best not to ask."

"Is the something far away from here?"

Zoe nodded.  "Pickup's on Newhall.  Solid three days' journey."

Mal considered their options, then sighed.  "Let's head out that way.  Kaylee, I want you to keep a good eye on Serenity."

She agreed.  "Yes, Cap'n."  He couldn't be right about River, and Kaylee figured keeping a close eye on Serenity would be one way to prove it.

"And," he added, holding her in her seat with a real ferocious look, "the next time you get some huāngmiù idea like playing whore to spy on the Alliance, I drop you back at home and find Serenity a new mechanic.  We clear?"

Kaylee knew she should agree meekly, but her momma didn't call her a stubborn fool for nothing.  "Weren't huāngmiù," she answered quietly.  "I helped."

"By putting yourself in danger without any backup," Mal answered, gettin' louder.

"Only because you wouldn't agree," Kaylee shot back.

"Hú shuō bā dào," Mal said, exasperated.  "This ain't a democracy, little Kaylee, and when I say no, I mean no.  I won't have you risking your neck--"

"Weren't her neck she was risking," Jayne muttered.

"--in some dangerous scheme like that, and," Mal added, rounding on Jayne.  "I don't remember asking for your opinion on the subject."

"Seems you're just mad 'cause Kaylee here got the information you needed for your little jailbreak," Jayne argued.  "She weren't hardly in danger.  Girl blended in like none o' the rest of us coulda, and this ain't a democracy, but mayhap you should listen to someone other than yourself once in a while."  Jayne shoved back his chair and stormed out, leaving Kaylee staring openmouthed at the empty doorway.

"This day keeps getting better and better."  Mal stood abruptly, looking hard at each of them in turn.  "I'm done with this conversation.  We're heading to Beaumonde by way of Newhall, and I want everyone watching River and Leung while we're in the black.  Dong ma?"

Kaylee still wasn't sure she agreed with him, but she nodded.  "Dong ma."

*****

Jayne weren't one to care much 'bout hurt feelings and pouting, 'less it got in his way.  Far as he could tell, Kaylee was mad at Simon, who was mad at Mal, who was mad at Inara, all 'bout something different.  And weren't none of 'em on board trusted Little Sister 'cept the Doc.  

So far, all that bad blood weren't getting' in his way none, so Jayne just went about his business -- took his turn watchin' the moonbrain, showed up to dinner, ate his fill, admired 'Nara and Kaylee a bit, then cleaned his guns 'fore climbing into bed with his girlie screens.  Not a bad way to pass the trip to Whitefall.

Should'a known it wouldn't last.  Right in the middle of dinner, no less.  Nearly jumped outta his skin when Little Sister leaned through the doorway all of a sudden, eyes wide, and pointed at Mal.  "You," she said, turning her finger 'round to beckon.  "Henry's coming around."

Like clockwork, everyone else jumped up and skedaddled after her, but Jayne's momma didn't raise no fool.  He surveyed the plates on the table, took an untouched potato, drippin' hot with butter, and pocketed the protein bar on Doc's plate before sauntering off toward the medbay.

Jayne stopped just outside the door, parking himself right up next to Kaylee to watch the freak show.  He didn't want to be any closer than necessary, just in case.  If the Alliance could control that spy from far away, he weren't about to trust that there weren't some crazy sort of transmitter in his noggin, too, reportin' back that one Jayne Cobb, wanted felon, were on this boat.

Mal was standing near the spy's head, arms crossed, face scrunched up into that Captain Tightass look he got at the most annoyin' times.  Doc was a half-step back, hovering 'bout his sister like she were like to burst into flames and he needed to be close enough to smother 'em out.  Zoe and Inara were leanin' against the far cabinets, quiet and observant.

"Why ain't you gone in?" Jayne asked Kaylee, sparin' her a quick glance.

She looked troubled, arms tucked right up under her breasts, brow furrowed.  "Didn't want to crowd him."

"The spy or pretty boy?" Jayne muttered, ignoring the tiny fist barely made an impression on his biceps.  "He talkin' sense yet?"

"Guess so," Kaylee answered, but she didn't sound real sure.  "Keeps saying the cockroaches are gatherin' at the K'uei-Hsing."

Jayne frowned, trying to place that name.  "Ain't that near Osiris?"

"Think so."

The spy's voice rose, and when Jayne turned back to the scene in the medbay, the moonbrain seemed agitated, eyes wide and staring at Little Sister.

"Tell them," he insisted, clamping his fingers 'round River's wrist.  "Tell them the cockroaches are crawling in--"

"Let her go," Doc interrupted, grabbing at the spy, who cringed and let go, bringing his hands up to protect his head.  Jayne's eyes narrowed.  Moonbrain was tortured at some point, never got proper training to resist.  Any self-respectin' thief could get through the Alliance torture chambers without so much as a peep 'bout nothin' real.  Spinnin' stories was the key, and Jayne found out the hard way he had a knack for tellin' tales.  Probably helped that Jayne weren't a moonbrain to start.

Combination of crazy and tortured made Jayne suspect this particular moonbrain couldn't tell the truth even if he wanted to, 'specially with Simon looming over him looking 'bout as fierce as he was able.  Weren't very fierce, to be sure, but Mal intervened anyway, one hand flat in the middle of Simon's chest to push him back a step.  "Simon," he warned.

Doc didn't relent 'till Little Sis turned those mooneyes on him and said, "Simon, stop."  She turned her attention back to her mollymawk, patting his shoulder like he were a kid with nightmares.  "Henry, tell me more about the cockroaches.  Tell me about the girls and the mice."  She turned her hand over, clasping Leung's in both of hers.  The spy met her gaze, and they stared at each other for a long while, silent.

Jayne frowned, not trustin' the way Little Sister was so friendly with a crazy Alliance puppet.  'Course, argument could be made that River was a crazy Alliance puppet, too.  Jayne edged closer, glancin' at Mal to make sure he was keepin' control of the situation.  Moonbrain looked sickly and weak, but Jayne wouldn't have expected a tiny girl like River to be able to take out twenty Reavers by herself, neither.

Leung nodded, starin' at River like she was salvation.  "Cockroaches.  Mice in dresses--" He stopped, shook his head.  "Girls in dresses.  Can't kill all the cockroaches."  He relented a bit, fell back against the chair and let his eyes half-close.  

River leaned closer, nodding, and said, "We can kill some of the cockroaches, Henry.  We'll keep the girls safe."

"River?" Mal prompted, eyebrows lifted expectantly.  "Care to translate?"

Little Sister glanced over at Doc, still pouting in the corner, then looked to Mal and said, "The Alliance built another Academy for gifted children."  Behind her, Doc stiffened, but River ignored him.  "It's on K'uei-Hsing, outside the capital."

Tilting his head just a touch, Mal said, "Excuse me?"

Zoe looked near as skeptical.  "You got that from his story about cockroaches and mice?"

Look on Little Sister's face was downright scary, and Jayne made sure to keep well back.  Girl said she could kill with her mind, and Jayne weren't stupid enough to test her.  River turned her attention back to the moonbrain.  "How close, Henry?"

Mal asked Simon, "What's she talking about?"

Simon glared at Mal, stepping closer to River and drawing a sharp look from his sister.

But the spy was rambling again, all kinds of nonsense about mice and K'uei-Hsing and metal; grated on Jayne's nerves enough that he had half a mind to leave.  Moonbrain weren't makin' sense, and who could trust River to translate proper?

"Not translating," River said, pinning Jayne with a fierce look.  "Henry's just getting some words mixed up."

"That or you're mixin' 'em up for him," Jayne suggested, defiant.  Probably foolish, too, but he weren't one to weigh his actions.  Stepping through the medbay door, he focused on Mal.  "Moonbrain's talkin' nonsense 'bout critters and vermin, and you're set to trust our own brainwashed assassin to explain what he means?"

"She's not an assassin," Simon snapped, stepping around River and bristling for a fight Jayne was more than happy to provide.

"Simon," Mal warned.  "Jayne--"

"I'm not brainwashed," Little Sister declared, prim as can be standin' there next to her mollymawk like she didn't cut his chest open when her head was on crooked.

"Care to tell that to my qìúxī?" Jayne demanded, grabbing his crotch.  "Think I'm still bruised from your little adventure at the Maidenhead."

"Jayne," Zoe admonished.  "Watch your tongue."

Jayne looked at her, openmouthed.  "Girl killed roomful o' Reavers and you're worried about her sensibilities?"

"The cockroaches will break the mice," Leung shouted, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes.

"No, they won't," Little Sister said in the sudden quiet.  "The cockroaches won't get a chance."  She patted Henry's shoulder and turned to stare at Mal.  "We're going to shut the Academy down before it opens."

Jayne, mouth dropping open, shook his head wildly.  "No ruttin' way," he said, turning away from River for backup.  "Mal, tell her we ain't doing no such thing."

*****

The tension aboard Serenity was beginning to affect Inara's ability to sleep.  She had always been hypersensitive to others' feelings; it was part of what made her such an effective Companion.  But the lingering resentments among the crew were wearing her down.

Jayne wanted to put Henry through an airlock and forget the information River had translated.  Simon wanted to wrap his defiant sister in cotton and hide her away for all time.  Kaylee wanted to help everyone, including Henry and the potential victims of a rebuilt Academy.  Mal wanted them all to simmer down and stay safe out in the black, though underneath it all he burned with anger at the Alliance for torturing children.  Zoe was quiet, which suggested to Inara that she didn't completely agree with Mal's flat refusal to discuss Henry's information.

Thankfully, Mal and Zoe and Jayne were (and she hated to use the word, considering their particular line of work) professional enough to leave their mistrust aside when they put down at Beaumonde.  Jean-Paul wasn't an easy person to deal with, but aside from a minor firefight, the transaction appeared to have gone off without a hitch; they reappeared at the agreed upon time, a sack of coins tucked in Mal's pocket.

"Let's go," Mal ordered shortly, climbing up the ramp and slamming the button that set the hatch to closing.  "I want us clearing atmo in five minutes."

Zoe and Jayne wordlessly headed off in opposite directions, and Mal spared Inara a brief glance.  "Any waves?"

"No," she answered, following him up toward the bridge.  She could tell from the stiffness in his frame that he was in no mood to talk, so she settled herself in the lounge with a book.  She stared at the pages as Serenity lifted off, but the delicate characters blurred into illegibility as her stormy thoughts kept her from concentrating.

As she suspected, once the ship cleared Beaumonde's atmosphere, Mal left the bridge to rustle in the galley cupboards for something to eat.  Inara didn't move until he dropped into his customary seat at the table with a tired sigh.  She considered letting him be, but knew she couldn't leave the lounge unnoticed anyway.  Might as well make it worth her while.

She stood, drawing his attention immediately, and moved toward the cupboard to fix herself a saucer of tea.  Mal didn't speak as she heated the water, and Inara knew any conversation would be an uphill battle.  She carried her tea to the table and sat a few seats down from him, trying not to crowd him.  "Where are we headed?" she asked.

Mal huffed a laugh.  "Not beating around the bush today, eh?"

"No reason to," Inara admitted.  "We're done with the Beaumonde job.  No immediate obligations.  What's next is a fair question."

"Same as always," Mal answered, keeping his focus on the plate of food in front of him.  "'Nother job."

She let his answer stand for a moment, debating whether to admit what she'd been doing during the journey to Beaumonde.  With a fortifying sip of tea, she fixed her gaze on him.  "I did a little poking around--"

Mal shot her an irritable look.  "Inara."

"--and found quite a bit to suggest that Henry's information about an Academy on K'uei-Hsing is correct."  That he didn't immediately stand up and leave the room was as close as Inara figured he would ever get to Why, thank you for your research, please do continue, Inara from him.  "The Alliance dedicated money to a 'research facility' on K'uei-Hsing about a year ago, and construction is scheduled to finish up next month.  It's hard to find much about any possible recruitment, but I did find this adwave.  It ran for about a week out on Persephone."  Inara pulled a scrap of paper from her pocket and flattened it against the tabletop before sliding it over to him.

Mal didn't touch it, but he did lean closer and read the words Inara had already memorized.

Does your child need a more challenging learning environment? The Alliance is proud to announce a new educational opportunity designed to aid the most gifted students achieve more than they dreamed.  Wave the Zhuang-Lun Wang Academy for more information.

"Zhuang-Lun-Wang Academy," he muttered irritably.  "That could be legitimate," Mal said, but he didn't sound convinced.

"The timing is suspicious at the very least," Inara pointed out.

"I won't risk lives on the basis of suspicious timing and an adwave out on a border planet," he sniped, stabbing at his block of protein with a fork.

"Mal--"

"Not right now, Inara," he interrupted, strain evident in his voice.  "I--"   He broke off, looking past her, and Inara turned to see River standing silent in the doorway.

"Hello," River greeted quietly, stepping down into the dining area and drifting toward the table.  Her hair was tucked behind one ear, her feet bare, but she looked more substantial, somehow, than she had in weeks.  More focused.  "Are we heading for K'uei-Hsing?"

Mal dropped his chin for a moment, shaking his head almost imperceptibly.  "No," he answered, his tone regretful.  "We can't risk it right now, River."

The smile River gave him was stunning in its joy, and more than a little disturbing in its incongruity.  River primly took a seat at the head of the table and held Mal's gaze, all but ignoring Inara.  "All warfare is based on deception."

Working his jaw for a moment, Mal gave a grudging nod.  "Yes, but this ain't warfare.  This," he said, gesturing at the ship around them, "is commerce."

"When able to attack, we must seem unable," River countered.  "When near, we must make them believe we are far away."

Inara could tell from the singsong quality of River's voice that she was quoting something, but didn't recognize the source.  Inara's education, after all, hadn't placed much emphasis on game theory or warfare.  A glance at Mal convinced her that he couldn't place the recitation either.

"River, I know what Leung said upsets you--"

"I'm not upset," River interrupted, that serene smile crumbling along with her composure, "because we're going to make sure that Academy doesn't open."  She leaned closer, eyes wide.  "Hold out bait to entice the enemy.  Feign disorder and crush him.  Pretend to be weak, that he may grow arrogant."

"No need to pretend, River, we are weak," Mal pointed out.  "I wish we had the forces to take out the Academy, River, but we're down a man, two if you count the Shepherd as a fighting man--" Pain tightened his features at this mention of their dead-- "and this isn't a platoon under the best of circumstances."

"Time moves in one direction," River lamented, sorrow bowing her shoulders.  "I want to go back and bring them with us."

Mal's jaw tightened.  "Can't go back.  Just live and learn from your mistakes."

"Wasn't a mistake," River countered, straightening once more and meeting Mal's gaze with fierce assurance despite the tears sparkling in her eyes.  "Wash agrees."

Inara stared at River.  She couldn't possibly--

Mal thumped his fist against the table.  "We fight when we got no other choice," he said, tone grim, "but a tactical assault?  We're not trained for that."

Inara took mental stock of the crew -- two soldiers, a mercenary, a doctor, a Companion, a mechanic, and a trained assassin -- and tended to agree with Mal.  Could they really expect to take on the Alliance again and walk away mostly intact?  She closed her eyes for a moment and conjured up Wash's familiar face.  Would this be worth River's life?  Kaylee's?  Mal's?

"Yes," River answered, and when Inara looked over, she was startled to find the girl looking straight at her, eyes wide and desperate.  "It is worth risking our lives.  You don't understand what they'll do to these girls."

Shame pooled in Inara's gut.  "River--"

"Needles and scalpels and simulations that don't ever seem like they'll end," River continued, her voice shrill.  "They manipulate your mind until you don't know what's real and what's not, until you'll do horrible things to stop the pain, because what you're doing isn't real anyway.  Nothing's real.  Only it is."  She sucked in a breath.  "And then you've killed people, real people, without knowing it or wanting it or meaning it, and nothing I ever do will bring them back."

"River," Mal said, low and soothing.  "That's not your fault--"

"I did it," she interrupted, tears shimmering in her eyes.  "I didn't want to stab him with a pen.  Too much blood, no air, too much suffering.  I didn't want to kill anyone, but I did, and it doesn't matter why anymore, because time moves in one direction and I can't undo it."  Regret radiated from River until Inara ached for the girl.  River turned to Inara and nodded, "You can feel it, but only a little.  It doesn't ever stop."

"I've killed, too," Mal said quietly.  "It ain't ever fun, and that feeling won't go away.  But getting the rest of my crew, getting your brother killed in some sort of revenge–"

"It's not revenge," River protested, her tone vehement.  "I can't ever get the men who did this to me -- Dr. Mathias is dead already.  But I can keep them from doing it to someone else."  River leaned closer, pinning Mal with her gaze.  "Băi chuān guī hăi.  I know you want to save me.  I don't need saving anymore, but you can save the next River."  She paused to let her words sink in.  "Time moves in one direction."

Mal looked grim.  "I'm sorry.  We can't.  I won't risk my crew."

"Attack him where he is unprepared," River said, her tone desperate now as she stood, her pleading gaze still fixed on Mal.  "Appear where you are not expected."   She stepped back.  "You risk your crew for coin.  You risked Wash for what's right.  This is why you joined up."  She shook her head, pressed her trembling lips together.  She shrugged.  "War's not over, Mal."

Inara flinched, expecting an explosion from Mal as River turned on her heel and left.  But Mal's only response was a desolate silence.  When Inara looked over at him, she could tell River's implicit accusation of cowardice had cut him to the quick.  "She's wrong," Inara told him quietly.

"Is she now?" Mal asked bitterly.  His chair skidded backwards and he carried his half-eaten meal to the trash, dumping it, then tossing his metal plate and fork into the sink.

"The war is over, Mal.  River is--"

"Not now, Inara," he snapped, his boots clomping up the stairway to the bridge.  Inara wanted nothing better than to follow him, but knew he would accept no comfort from her.  And he wasn't in the frame of mind to listen to reason.

*****

Glossary | Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | End Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven
Firefly fic